Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Blog posts due September 16th.


I don't know why I liked this piece. The subject matter was uninteresting to me, the characters did not entertain me, but the description of the events hooked me in. She could have just said “I thought about boys kissing me and touching me” but she said “I imagined those boys hand on me, their spit in my mouth”. Though the subject was weak, her descriptions were strong and really took you back a little bit.


I felt bad for Olivia. It seemed like she created the imaginary figure of Charlie Ravioli because she is lonely to the point an imaginary friend wont even hang out with her. However, once the aunt informed the Gopnik that this was quite normal, I went from pitying Olivia to viewing Charlie Ravioli as a satire of her perception of adults. However, I did not really enjoy this story. This is an example of telling and not showing.


This story had a really good, cute, funny attention grabber. However after that it wanders for a while, telling and not showing. Why should I care about Colin? Why should I care about him wanting to go to OCSCU or wanting to be an fbi agent? Why do I need to know about his friends? I figured that after that paragraph it would be the end of it, but it wasn't. It just kept on going and going. I will say though, the part about street fighter made me smile because that was something that was a part of my own child hood (and I will take any one on as Bison :) ) If this was not for school, I would have stopped.


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